When kids are tiny, they're forever doing new things for the very first time. First smile. First roll over. First tooth. It's like Bam! Bam! Bam! One milestone after another in a Yep done that, what's next? kind of way. Then eventually the milestones seem to get further and further apart- which is probably just as well as otherwise reception kids would be driving themselves to school.
Once the health visitor's little red book has been rendered redundant (at some point after the stabilizers have been abandoned but before first legal drink), conversations like this are a fantastic way to chart the progress of offspring:
All 5 of us are walking past the park on the way to a friends house for lunch. E is being unusually stand-offish and weird. The pavement is wide enough to accommodate at least 3 people yet he seems to feel the need to walk either 2 paces in front or 2 paces behind the rest of us. I suddenly realise it's because we are in PUBLIC and there are teens nearby.
Me: Ah... You're being like this cause of them, right? Help me out- was I was being too familiar?
E: (Responding while not looking at me) Yes you were.
Me: Ah, sorry. Forgot.
Keith: What if we do THIS? (Grabs my hand and we start skipping) Does this embarrass you mate?
E: No, I think you'll find you're only embarrassing yourselves.
Me: How about THIS? (Me & K kiss. Extensively. We make our point and then some more)
E: Eww but no. Still embarrasing yourselves...
Me: Yet you're still walking with us? Ah I love you... (toustle his hair)
E: No DON'T touch me!!... (Age 12 1/2)
M: Daddy- can I have a kiss too? (Age 7)
J: (Laughing and slapping his knee) Kiss each other again- that was FUNNY! (Age 9)
