Home schooling

A history lesson in Clas Ohlson. Kids were hypnotised by large spinning black disc for 10 whole minutes...

Monday morning

I wake up to much shouting downstairs this morning. From under my duvet I can hear raised voices. The children are having breakfast. Apparently there has been a large cereal spillage. My eldest child is (loudly) attempting to coordinate a clean up operation with assistance from the youngest. She is (loudly) unwilling to give it, and stating their strategy should be to proceed upstairs and inform me. He (loudly) states that they can handle this situation without my help and as she was the spiller, she should contribute to the clean up. They argue (loudly) about their strategy for many minutes, but are unable to reach a consensus.

I do not handle loud noise in the morning. I mutter under my breath as I stumble downstairs and into the kitchen. They stop arguing as they see me appear in the doorway. I walk into the kitchen and give both a 'bad mark' on their pocket money chart before saying good morning.

Eldest child leaves the room in tears of righteous anger. Youngest is also tearful but apologetic. Middle child calmly looks up from his weetabix and asks, 'Mummy- can we have a private chat when I've finished this please?' I perform the clean up while middle child scrapes his bowl clean, before following him into an empty room. He closes the door behind us and whispers loudly 'You're being a weeeeeeeeeeee bit stressey this morning...'